For a while now, this verse has truly helped me get past my fear. I encourage you all to keep this in your heart as the Lord is with you always. Tomorrow, as I have my double mastectomy, I know that God will be there with me and my doctors. I want to say thank you all for your kind words, prayers and support. You all are amazing!
This past week has been confusing to say the least. I was just “numb”. I didn’t have many feelings about what was about to happen. I think my nerves and excitement basically balanced each other out. I also got a little sick which totally messed up my schedule. I had everything planned to “stay busy”. 1. Clean 2. Laundry 3. Clean 4. Organize and although it may not be perfect and it will drive me nuts not to be able to finish it when I get home, I think I will be okay.
Is it weird that I still do not feel like it is happening? (thanks to the month of May) I know that will quickly change as I am in my gown about to count down to go to sleep. I am not worried about going under, cut open or stitched up but I am worried for a possible infection and for the drains that I will have in afterwards. The surgery is lengthy supposably about 4-6 hours. No idea of the accuracy on that until in the morning but I do know it will be awhile. I go in at 6:15am and I am assuming surgery will start a few hours later. I can’t imagine the feelings my husband will be in during this time, so keep him in your thoughts and prayers too please!
As today is the day before surgery, it is also a very special day for me. Three years ago, I married my best friend!! What says Happy Anniversary more than Hey, you’ll get to be my nurse for awhile =). He is so awesome and I am so lucky to have him. I promise not to be too awful after this, just don’t wake me if I am sleeping. We all know I love my naps! =)
It is getting late so as I sit here and attempt to fall asleep, I will say my prayers and try to stay relaxed. Isaiah 41:10 will be on repeat. Love you all, xoxo Ashley
Tomorrow is a new day, a new start and a new beginning so you better own it, love it and make the best out of it!